So OK, I am in a process of learning to live life authentically. Now that’s not to say I am a fake, not at all, but what it means is that I carry a lot of beliefs and judgements that cloud my authenticity.
I know my values, but boy that took some work, and I think the journey isn’t over yet, but my beliefs, they are tricky to get to know. So why are beliefs bad? Well they are not, they are a way that we learn to interpret and understand the world, but when they stop me from achieving and being my true self, then there is a problem.
So when we are born we are pure. We are a clean slate. We are our true authentic self. Then everyday we learn something about the word we live in. It maybe that you were told not to talk to strangers, which is great when you are 5, but are you still a little nervous when a fellow human being smiles at you for no reason? Or maybe you were teased that you were podgy when you were a kid, and now you belief that image is important. Maybe your mum stayed home and looked after you, so you believe that being a good mum means staying at home, and you feel guilt for having to work. Maybe you watched Wall Street as a kid and now think Greed is Good.
The beliefs are sometimes really subtle, and can come from watching an episode of your favourite soap, or after hearing a debate on the radio. It can be something that your favourite pop band said on twitter. Everything shapes us.
So eventually the whole authentic self is a little, or a lot less full.
So what can I do to reconnect with my whole self. Well being coached has certainly helped me, Its help me shrink the red and orange chapes, making me a little lighter. But being attuned to my instincts has helped too.
Yesterday it was inferred that I was not a great Mum because I hadn’t ironed my daughters PJ’s. I immediately felt my stomach tense, my body was telling me something. I knew that this was not my belief, that my ability to raise children had nothing to do with my ironing abilities, but I felt judged, I felt injustice. (Justice being a core value of mine)
Now here is the learning for me. I am discovering my values and beliefs and I know that my core is a house built on rocks, not sand. Others may try to sway me, knock me off course or make me doubt myself. Being authentic, true to myself and others makes me a lighter and a freer human.
So here is this weeks homework….
In the last hour, when have you made a comment, judgement or decision based on a belief, not from an authentic value based place in your heart. Believe me it will be easy.