The amygdala hijack

Whether you are stoical, cool as a cucumber or dramatic and very emotional, you will have experienced an amygdala hijack, probably today.

The amygdala is a collection of cells near the base of the brain where emotions are given meaning, remembered, and attached to associations and responses to them (emotional memories). It is part of the limbic system and where your fear and pleasure sensors are processed. It is the reason why you can smell a smell and it takes you right back to a moment or person, or hear a song and remember a key moment in your life. 

Fight, flight or freeze

The mammal brain is our basic survival mechanism.

Early humans were exposed to the constant threat of being killed or injured by wild animals or other tribes. To improve the chances of survival, the fight- or-flight response evolved. It’s an automatic response to physical danger that allows you to react quickly without thinking. As babies, we learn about our world and create responses to help us survive, and these become automatic responses that may or may not be useful to us as adults.

When you feel threatened and afraid, the amygdala automatically activates the fight-or-flight response by sending out signals to release stress hormones that prepare your body to fight or run away. The blood drains from your brain and other parts of your body and rushes to your limbs to get read to run or fight. 

This response is triggered by emotions like fear, anxiety, aggression, and anger.

So when you go into a high stress or "danger" situation in the workplace, it is likely that your automatic response will be triggered by an amygdala hijack, and so too will the other person.

The human function

And yet, we are human. Our brains have developed an executive function that sets us apart from the animals. We are able to strategise, analyse, apply logic, vision and build trust. This happens in the frontal lobes. The newer, rational, and more advanced brain system can be hijacked and shut down, or dialled up and utilised. Those that are able to calm the mind and activate the executive function actually increase IQ, make better decisions and form better relationships. 

You are either in control of your emotions, or your emotions control you.

The frontal lobes allow you to process and think about your emotions. It is where we employ our emotional intelligence, our humanity and compassion. You can manage these emotions and determine a logical response. Unlike the automatic response of the amygdala, the response to fear from your frontal lobes is consciously controlled by you.

When you sense danger, you can notice how your body feels, notice your feelings and then ask yourself, is this a real danger or is my mammal brain in control? Your amygdala wants to automatically activate the fight-or-flight response immediately but by tuning into yourself, taking some deep breathes, slowing down, your executive function can process the situation and assess if danger is real or imagined and how best to respond.

When flooded with cortisol and adrenaline, you respond with fight (judgement, control, power over, dominate) or you can calm the mind and activate oxytocin, dopamine and serotonin. This creates the ability to listen, empathise, connect and strategise. The very human parts of all of us. 

In the conversational context

Imagine going into the conversation with your mammal brain at play. 

How would your body, mind and responses react?

If you tried to control the situation or dominate the other person, interrupting or telling/yelling at them, how would you expect them to respond?

Imagine, taking some deep breathes, calming yourself and actively listening to the other person. How would that impact the relationship?

Imagine easing your body language and tone. How would someone else respond to you not being "threatening"?

Whichever brain you bring to the conversation will determine how the conversation will go.

Notice your brain, your thoughts, feelings and behaviours, the next time you are in conversation.