Being vulnerable goes against everything we were taught. We are taught that "it's a dog eat dog world", "look out for number one", "boys don't cry". We are taught to armour up and put that professional mask on. Self-preservation is fine if you are a lone wolf, but when you are a team, it is harmful. The only way to overcome it is to create psychological safety in teams. That doesn't mean that every session is like group therapy. You are still focusing on work and the results, but you do it by putting aside your ego and choosing to support the greater good.
When team members can say, "I don't understand", "I made a mistake", "I need help", without feeling judged or attacked, then you know you have vulnerability based trust. If this is new to you, then a great entry gate is using Everything DiSC personality profiles to share your preferences, strengths and weaknesses.
Sometimes it’s during the process of coming clean about weaknesses that the biggest breakthroughs happen among team members. Giving people as much information as possible about who a person is and why this person might act the way he or she does will greatly reduce the likelihood of unfair judgments.
The idea of using profiles is to give members an objective and reliable means for dialogue that leads to greater understanding, thus reducing judgement. If members can share their behavioural profiles in a facilitated way, they soon begin conversations about their strengths and weaknesses. They will form a common language around their likenesses or differences. They can find ways to work together more effectively without assumptions and misunderstandings.
A case study
During a 2 day five behaviours of a cohesive team programme, one team shifted from resentment to understanding using the profiling activity. The Engineering Director, Colin, was a conscientious leader who like to be the expert and was naturally more risk adverse. The Head of Production, Stuart, was a dominant profile. He just wanted to find the quickest way from A-B and didn't want to hear all of the reasons why something wouldn't work. They were at constant loggerheads with each other and meetings generally became heated and not productive.
Colin thought Stuart was aggressive and took too many risks, never listening to the expertise. He found him arrogant and ego driven. Stuart thought that Colin was a blocker and was trying to assert power over him by dismissing and challenging his ideas.
During the session, both realised that neither was being difficult or obstructive. Instead they realised that they both had different approaches to solving a problem and making decisions. They began to appreciate each others weaknesses and find a way to work together in the future.
So they went from ill feeling to appreciation. From judgement to understanding. Their ability to be vulnerable helped to heal the toxic behaviours and move towards a common goal together.
DiSC® can help people gain insight and empathy, qualities that allow a team to build trust. Everything DiSC® The Everything DiSC® model is made up of four basic styles: Dominance (D), Influence (i), Steadiness (S), and Conscientiousness (C). Each style is divided into three regions.
Checklist
Remember
Keep in mind that everyone is a blend of all four styles, but most people tend strongly toward one or two styles. Whether a person is in the centre of one style or in a region that borders two, no location is better than another. All DiSC styles are equal and valuable in their own ways.
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